Things I Just Don't Get

On another short detour here, just down the road from Things That Annoy Me Greatly (they run parallel to each other, don't ya know?)

1) Trolls. Not the kind that live under the bridge and taunt the three billy goats gruff, and not the kind you see in Lord of the Rings. I'm talking about the ones that go on to internet forums and deliberately cause havoc by posting false stories or attacking other posters.

This makes no sense to me, probably because I'm not an attention whore. But really, if you have nothing else to do with your time than to invent soap-opera stories of woe and distress, shouldn't you find another hobby...like, I don't know, knitting? And people who post just to antagonize members of a forum? Puhhh-leaaase. If you don't like the kitchen, there's nothing saying you have to eat the food. So just go on your merry way and find some goats to pick on.

2) People who tailgate. Look, I know your time is just soooo much more important than mine (and everyone else's, come to that) but hanging out on my rear bumper is not going to intimidate me into going faster. It will make me change lanes, because I don't want to be part of the accident you will cause, but I have news for you: your brakes are not that good. If I have to stop, you'll be in my trunk, and assuming the accident doesn't hurt you, your insurance company will.

3) Competitive parents: those of you who have kids know the type. You know, the ones who loudly announce that they breastfed until their kids were in high school, always used cloth diapers, never fed them anything but organic food and wouldn't think of letting their kids not sleep with them. And their kids---at the age of a few years old---are rapidly discovering the cure for cancer and/or have gotten early admission to Harvard. Or they stay at home and look down their noses at women who work. Or they work and tell the stay-at-homes that they're wasting their lives. And so on, until there's a lot of hurt feelings on both sides.

In short, their whole purpose seems to be to shout "I am a better parent than youuuuuu!!!!" And they do it often enough that they make other parents feel incompetent.

Well, I also have news for you: you're not. You're just different. And so are the ultra-crunchy-granola moms. And the ones who stay at home, and the ones who go to work. The one thing that should unite us as moms is that we have kids and we love them and want the best for them. So, all you moms who love sitting in judgment on all the other moms---can it. Motherhood is hard enough without adding your garbage to the mix.

4) Nosy reporters. I'm not talking about the garden variety reporters, but the ones who go up to a grieving family and ask that most inane of all questions: "So, how do you feel?" Really? You have to ask?

That's my list for today. I'm sure there will be others when I think of them. :)